If Only

If only there was something that could take back time. If only I had the power to reverse time and make the right decisions. I replay every memory over and over in my mind, searching for the exact moment where everything began to fall apart. Was it the first time I answered his text? The first date? The first lie I chose to ignore because I believed love could change someone? Or was it the day I silenced the little voice inside me that kept whispering, "Walk away before it's too late"?

If I had the power to turn back the hands of time, I would listen to that voice.

Back then, I mistook attention for love. He made me feel seen, special, and important. He knew exactly what to say, exactly how to make me smile, and exactly how to convince me that I was the only woman he wanted. Looking back now, I realize I wasn't in love with who he truly was. I was in love with the version of him he wanted me to believe.

Everyone around me noticed the red flags long before I did. My friends warned me that he was inconsistent. My family questioned his intentions. They saw how he disappeared for days without explanation and returned with sweet words that somehow erased every doubt I had. But I defended him every single time. I called it misunderstanding. I called it love. I called it giving someone a chance.

Now I call it the biggest mistake of my life.

The truth is, love should never require you to lose yourself. Yet little by little, I did. I ignored my instincts. I lowered my standards. I accepted excuses where I deserved honesty. Every time he disappointed me, I convinced myself things would get better. I kept waiting for the man he promised he would become instead of accepting the man standing right in front of me.

Then came...