Chapter Eleven:
THE THINGS WE LOSE
Years passed. Life, which had once seemed promising for Omar and Fatuma, slowly began changing. The small business they had started in town had survived for some years, but eventually things stopped working as they had before. Customers became fewer, expenses increased, and the money that once seemed enough started disappearing faster than it came in.
At first, Omar did not worry. Every business had difficult seasons. He believed things would improve. But the problem was that Fatuma had become careless with money. She bought things they did not necessarily need. Whenever she saw something she liked, she found a reason to have it. She had become accustomed to a certain lifestyle, and whenever Omar tried to remind her about the business, she felt he was simply trying to control her. The money they had once saved slowly disappeared.
Then one morning, Omar opened the storage area and realized there was barely enough stock left to keep the business running. He stood there for several minutes, staring at the empty shelves. He felt something heavy settle inside him. "Fatuma!" She came from the other room. "What?" "Where is the money?" "What money?" "The business money." Fatuma looked at him.
"What about it?" "There is almost no stock left." "So?"
"Fatuma, how are we going to continue?" She sighed. "You always find something to complain about." "I'm not complaining. I'm asking you a question." "And what do you expect me to do?" Omar looked at her. "I expected you to help me protect the business." Fatuma became angry. "So everything is my fault now?" "I didn't say that." "But that's what you're implying." Omar walked away.
He did not want another argument. But the arguments did not stop. They became part of their daily life. Sometimes it was about money. Sometimes it was about the business. Sometimes they argued about things that neither of them could even remember by the end of the day. The home that was once supposed to be their place of peace became a place of constant tension.
Omar began spending more time outside. Sometimes he would sit alone for hours before going home. And during those quiet moments, a woman he had not thought about in years began appearing in his mind. Miriam. He remembered her calmness. He remembered how she used to pray. He remembered how she avoided unnecessary arguments.
He remembered the way she had tried to hold their family together even when the people around him were against her. Most painfully, he remembered Sarah. His daughter. The daughter he had barely gotten the chance to know before everything fell apart.
One evening, Omar sat outside the house after another argument with Fatuma. He looked at the dark sky. For the first time, he allowed himself to ask a question he had avoided for years. What if I had listened to Miriam? The question hurt.
He closed his eyes. What if he had protected his marriage? What if he had refused to listen when his family spoke badly about her? What if he had never secretly married Fatuma? What if he had stood beside Miriam when she needed him? Maybe things would have been different. Maybe Miriam and Sarah would still be with him. Maybe they would have built a better life together. Maybe the business would not have mattered as much because he would have had his family beside him.
Omar lowered his head. People often realize the value of something only after losing it. When something is in our hands, we sometimes treat it as though it will always remain there. We assume tomorrow will give us another chance. We believe people will always wait for us. We believe love can survive every wound....